Helluva week at work

I thank God the week wrapped up. Professionally speaking, it was one of the worst in my life.

There’s something you don’t know is that I’m a person terribly bugged in company. People, 2 persons standing out, love to take the piss out of me, to make me fed up, it’s a common and natural practice to them.  The worst in this scenario, hierarchically, they are above me, so I always needed to keep myself under control before answering back to them.

One of them, my immediate superior, as a matter of fact, have been launching me into disgusting and annoying situations publicly for just two years, much before becoming my superior three through four months ago. He is younger than me even though he does not look so. He is the sort of person who does not seek to find out in advance whether someone will like his clowning habits. There was a time in the past that I turned a blind eye to him, pretending not to have even glanced at him. After that, I had more tranquility.

Basically, what he does is to be exposing you publicly with delicate and personal matters, forcing me to reveal about my personal life and with subjects related to sex, two years doing so. Moreover, exposing my professional performance so that everybody would laugh at it, by hearing from him “if you know of any case that has been running awkwardly, give Marcola (my nickname) such a case and see it terribly spoiled”.  On top of that, with such a ridiculous habit, he used to pass by me at my workplace and at times to hit my butt with his hand. And to make matters worse, what made me explode in hatred at him by calling him ‘son of a bitch’, was because for the fourth time he slapped my head, for the second time when I was on the phone working. That turned out to be unbearable to me and I violently reacted toward him, expressing feelings of disgust and how much revolting the situation became. You should know that I had already expressed to him twice that I don’t like anybody slapping my head, at one opportunity I swore at him more slightly than the last time after a strong slap when I was on the phone, and at the other, when I told him if he’d like to have me coming behind him while he was working and hit him on the head just as well. In both occasions he walked away clowning, even after my rude reactions, expressing that I substantially disliked what he’d done.

After my temper was raised, taking the piss out of me, he told me “oh, you got nervous, if you dislike it, you’d better tell me that appropriately”, and I answered back, “what is it to tell you something appropriately, is it to react furious at you as I’m doing now?”. He then kept stood next to me; I was on the phone with a customer, and after a couple of minutes and walked off, not talking to me anymore.

Now, the final episode, the worst of the very same Thursday, between an ex manager and I. He is another one who has always been exposing me publicly to make people laugh, making the whole situation hilarious to everybody around, everyone would laugh their heads off such as when I was taken on in that department and I was requested to write a small presentation of me to be forward to our co-workers and peers in the US. Okey-dokey, I wrote it and sent it across. Some minutes later, I saw him spreading the impact it caused in the US, an impact that seemed to be much more meaningful here in Brazil. I confess, I was picky with my works in English, I wrote it very formal and expressing that I was determined to provide customers with the best possible support, not using ‘provide’ and yes ‘furnish’ for instance, not fabricating anything. That had a long repercussion and inwardly, I was moody with all that, there was also a person who judged me nose-up. Only few ones came up to me and told me that the reaction in place was due to the fact that I write very good English that they could not ever reproduce. That was just to alleviate the whole fuss.

Eventually, let’s begin describing what happened last Thursday between my ex manager and me… Never had I answered back to him in that company, and naturally, if I were to do it one day, that would be kidding. A savage feeling has been fostering inside of me with people all the time telling me to act in a way that I need to be straight to the point, forever and ever. I acknowledge that is particularly useful at work, not to be beating around the bush to explain something, to constrain myself only to the nitty-gritty of things. Nevertheless, for non professional matters, I do think that I need and want to be just myself and that should be enough said.

My superior turned up in front of my colleague and me and asked if we were to finish our calls for there was an incoming meeting fifteen minutes hence. My co-worker answered and I told him that my schedule finishes 30 minutes later than my colleague’s. He, being amusing, funny, kidding as appeared to be, answered back, “I did not ask you that”, and then asked me the same question again. One more time I gave him the same answer and so did he. Next time in a row, still kidding as it did seem to be, my answer was “but am I supposed to tell you only what you wanna hear?”. He added: “darn it, now that I ain’t Marcola’s manager he turned cheeky. No sooner had five minutes gone by when I heard from him “if I was Marcola’s manager I’d fire him”. As a normal reaction of mine, especially in front of someone who’s been playing around with words, I smiled at him. Whereupon it, I got on his nerves, his faced was then bringing out his anger from within at me. He added fuel to the fire by saying “say you doubt me”; inside me, I asked myself “what?”, and he continued, “say you doubt me”, and he walked off kind of “throwing a party” with the occurred event, telling aloud how cheeky I am now and what I deserve. There was another person close to me who I questioned “did he take that seriously?”. His answer was “Do not take him seriously, he is nuts, he’s a drunkard.” Now, my personal point of view, I saw the eminence of my dismissal taking place and had I told him “I doubt you”, I had been run across serious troubles and he’d have forced something to fire me, as I saw that there was no real reason for so.

Okay, that Thursday was just insurmountable to me, I had problems to sleep at night since I would wake up in the middle of the night frequently with all those events of the day bumping my head. The following day was very tense, I talked to another superior of mine who had seem what happened on the previous day, and then we went to a meeting room to discuss about the events.

I told him everything about both of them along all the time I’ve been in the company. He disapproved of them and admitted that I was right and I needed to tell them off somehow. Regarding that the situation was more acute to me when compared with other people, and according to him, that such a wild behavior of them should not be perpetuated, he advised me to schedule a meeting with their respective managers and try to discover why I was threatened to be fired on the previous day and also reveal about their naughty behavior.

As advised, I listed everything I wanted to point out and at the meeting with my ex-manager, my current manager, and their boss, I had the biggest and undesired surprise. First of all, the big boss did not approve of me, he did not want me to reunite all of them in a room to discuss about that when instead, I could’ve talked directly to my ex-manager and get it solved. I needed to explain that I was advised to do so and I was not feeling so secure to talk to my ex-manager, not confident that he would listen to me and we would put an end to what I was still considering a misunderstanding between us. What really upset me and discouraged me to keep on trusting my ex-manager was the stated reason he threatened me to be fired, a lame excuse thoroughly fabricated which I could not easily believe. He stated that he told me to fire me because I had told him “you aren’t any longer my manager and therefore I need not report to you anymore”. I said “what?”. What a tremendous liar and the worst of all, he told to have a witness and asked me if he could bring him in to confirm that. My prompt response was: “sure, you can bring him here” and I did not tell him any word of the stated. Just recapping, what I told him was “but am I supposed to tell you only what you wanna hear?”. Not only did he made up that story, but also he biased by “warping” another event, when I was in doubt which manager to report to during the transition of managers. He told everybody at the meeting that I said “I will look for the new manager for you are not the one appointed to help me”, expressing that I told so and he pretty much disliked that. Inwardly, I told myself “what?”

Unfortunately, I saw that I was in a rather complicate situation and in the end, I came to know that my ex manager was being serious when telling to fire me and that ended in nothing during the meeting, no real reason for so was brought to evidence and at least, I was told not to have him bugging me anymore, I think that was still a gain.

Before leaving the company, I looked for the until-then impertinent immediate superior of mine to put an end to that story. He acknowledged, admitted that he was wrong with what he’d been doing and I was in total rights to have reacted such way. Not only, he underwent and told me to rest assured that what was going on would not reoccur. Much to my surprise, he did not remember all the events along two years, all the things  I brought to light during the conversation and he said to me, that I should avoid allowing people to do things I do not like against me and also that I should’ve been clearer in expressing I disliked everything. Well, I told him to be the fourth time he hit me on the head and I had sufficiently exposed how much I disapprove of it. Concerning the other things, I confess, I kept myself silent because it serves as life experience, I may learn how to tackle inwardly unacceptable life events. My reaction that cropped up out of the blue was a composite of everything entailing two years, and probably, if he didn’t keep on slapping me, I would not easily reveal the disturbance his behavior causes. But as predicated, I keep myself under bad things intentionally so as to learn how to tackle them.

Summing up, we made up, I feel I can trust him despite everything and I see a clear possibility for us to carry on normally as though nothing happened. But now, concerning my ex-manager, I could see on Friday when I went to tell him goodbye and he didn’t even look at me, that things may not go on smoothly. I think he won’t easily forget the events and he promised to talk to me seriously only, from now on. I thank God he’s not my manager anymore after all the aforementioned, I feel our relationship could go on trembling and now it’s difficult to rely on him completely. It’s like to see someone doing something to praise you one day and on the very next day to do otherwise under threat. I clarified to him during the meeting that he’s a person I never identify when telling the truth or just kidding, and always sounding like a threat when requesting things to be done.

Aside: Saturday, I dreamed of my ex-manager and he was my father in it, would you believe it?

I don’t plan to foster any disagreement or quarrel between my ex-manager. I just hope not to run into troubles unnecessarily and unfairly once again.

Undoubtedly, it was a terrible week as I can’t remember of any similar. I am already packed with lots of responsibilities, it’s my onus to dedicate myself to studying and learning in order to do a good job, and it’s a universe of knowledge to go through.

Thanks my bosom-friend for being all ears to me, another witness to everything about my ex-manager and totally agrees with me by and large.

Well, after getting it off my chest, I hope to have a delightful week at work and the next one I’m going on vacation for 30 days. Hmm, it is high time it happened; I haven’t had vacations for more than four years.

Something I cannot undergo and stay quiet is: to have someone making his best efforts to achieve something and see others around treating them in a silly manner like underestimating them.

I’ve had enough, but with soundness now!

 

Comments

[claud]

haha dude you write novels with each post!! :)

have a good vacay and I hope it works out with your boss!

[marcosps]

That bosom-friend mentioned above has no long played that role in my life... she's actually somewhat pushed aside, I think I was kind of deluded with that story...